by Mary | May 7, 2010 | Books
By Mary DeTurris Poust
Today’s featured Catholic mom-writer is Cathy Adamkiewicz, communications director and editor of PIME World Magazine and the author of Broken and Blessed: A Life Story, an incredibly powerful book about her daughter Celeste, who died at only four months old due to a rare heart defect. I picked up Broken and Blessed one night a while back and could not put it down until I was finished. It is the beautiful story not only of a short life well lived but of a mother’s steadfast faith in the face of unbearable suffering.
I know that for some moms this Mother’s Day will not be easy or happy because they are suffering with children who are sick or are grieving children who are gone, so I asked Cathy if she could offer some words of healing to those mothers. What she had to say will touch the heart of every mother (and father):
“It seems mothers’ hearts are made to be broken. They break a little each day as our children grow and move away from us. Every time they get hurt – which of course they all do – it hurts us, too, because we are bonded to our children in such a unique way. But for those of us who lose a child to death, the heartbreak is so intense that there are really no words for it…
“Five years after my daughter’s death, I feel the pain just as intensely, but because there is truth to the old adage about time healing all wounds – even wounds like this – I seem to feel the pain less often.
“Truthfully, I can’t imagine getting through such a loss without a relationship with Jesus. When people ask me ‘How did you do it?’ all I can say is ‘Jesus.’ I say it not to make myself sound pious. It’s just the truth.
“From the moment Celeste was born, I threw everything – my pain, my worry, my stress about her condition, my hope – right back at God. It was simply too big for me to handle. I felt tiny and weak, and so very helpless. My daughter’s suffering and the fact that she might never come home were such big crosses that I wanted to run away, but I couldn’t. So I told Jesus that I trusted Him. And I gave her back to Him, because she was never really ‘mine’ to begin with.
“I also found a renewal of my relationship with the Blessed Mother. She could understand my suffering better than anyone. She knew what it was like to watch an innocent child suffer. Each day when I left the hospital, I left Celeste in her arms. Today I still do that with my other children when I’m worried about them or can’t be near them.
“In the past five years I’ve learned a lot about life from my Celeste. I learned that every single life is incredibly precious – and MEANINGFUL. Each of us has a unique purpose. It comforted me immensely to know that God had a plan for my daughter, and that she fulfilled it. I also learned to worry less about the small things in life, and to really enjoy the beauty in every day. I’m reminded continually that ‘our value in is our being, not our doing.’ Each life – no matter how brief – is a tremendous gift to our world from a loving Father.”
To visit Cathy’s blog, “From the Field of Blue Children,” click HERE. For more information on her book, click HERE.
by Mary | May 7, 2010 | Uncategorized
Well, to Chiara a dandelion IS a flower of the fairest and rarest.
I always find a sunny little dandelion offering in Our Lady of Guadalupe’s hands after Chiara has spent time in the backyard. Either we need some serious weed killer or we need to adjust our opinion of the lowly dandelion.
I think Our Lady likes it just the same as a big bouquet of roses, especially since it’s coming from an innocent little girl who leaves it there with such joy and tenderness. If only we could all approach Mary with the same childlike enthusiasm.
by Mary | May 5, 2010 | Uncategorized
Today’s featured Catholic mom-writer is Lisa Hendey, creator of the wildly popular CatholicMom.com and author of the recently released “Handbook for Catholic Moms: Nurturing Your Heart, Mind, Body and Soul” (Ave Maria Press). Lisa’s new book covers just about every aspect of motherhood, from budgets and menus to prayer and organization, but today I want to focus on the fact that this book about motherhood starts not with children but with marriage.
Here’s what Lisa had to say about that:
“I had such a wonderful role model in my own parents, who raised five of us. I’m the oldest of five. And they really always prioritized their time together. It wasn’t always go out on a date night, but it was very clear to us that they truly and deeply loved each other, that they had fun with one another, and they demonstrated that in front of us. That gave all of us a very healthy role model for what a happy Catholic marriage looks like. Certainly they had their stressful or difficult times, but we had enough of those really happy times where they just enjoyed each other’s company and clearly had fun together.
“One of the things in my own marriage, being married to somebody who didn’t share my faith for a long time — although he was incredibly supportive of it — was that there was a big hole. We talk a lot about a sacramental marriage and putting Christ at the center of our marriage, but I wasn’t quite sure what that looked like in my life because we didn’t sit down and pray the Rosary together. Just looking at serving Christ by serving my spouse has been a huge thing for me, and the joy of that relationship and modeling that for my kids so they have a healthy sense of what a happy marriage looks like.
“For many mothers, the key to motherhood begins with marriage, with becoming one with your spouse and complementing your personal identity with being in that relationship. The fact that that comes first I think is a great precursor to motherhood where you put the demands and the needs of others sometimes ahead of your own.”
Lisa’s comments were a good reminder for me. What do my children see when they look at me and my husband — co-workers who are getting a job done or true partners who demonstrate on a daily basis what it means to live out our vocations as spouses and parents with Christ at the heart of our home?
The “Handbook for Catholic Moms” is filled with stories, advice, practical tips and spiritual inspiration for mothers from every walk of life and in every type of mothering situation. To learn more, visit Lisa’s website by clicking HERE. Lisa is also featured in my story on Catholic motherhood in the May 9 issue of OSV, which is available to subscribers by clicking HERE.
by Mary | May 5, 2010 | Uncategorized
In today’s post on Catholic mom-writers, I’m talking with Danielle Bean, mother of eight, editorial director of Faith & Family, and author (with Elizabeth Foss) of the newly released “Small Steps for Catholic Moms: Think. Pray. Act. Every Day” (Circle Press). Danielle talked to me about the need for Catholic mothers to support each other and to find ways to bring prayer into the daily events of their lives.
“We women are so great at tearing each other apart. As much as we’re great at tearing each other apart, we can get great at building each other up and encouraging each other in Christian living. That’s something we want to encourage more women to do in their parishes and their communities or even with just a couple of friends or online because connecting with other women is such a powerful thing,” says Danielle, whose new book has a prayer journal/study guide companion piece to help moms grow in faith on their own or in a group setting.
As a busy mom herself, Danielle recognizes that it’s not always easy for mothers to fit long sessions of formal prayer into days that often include running from soccer games and volunteer activities to making dinner and helping with school work. The key for Catholic moms, she says, is to remember that even “attaching bits of prayer” to certain times or events of the day can add up to big spiritual gains. Those ‘small steps’ are pleasing to God and lead to big steps in the end.
“Ultimately the goal for anybody who is living an active vocation is to recognize that that does not have to be contradictory to growing closer in your relationship with God and advancing in holiness because this is what God intends for you. It doesn’t mean that you can’t have a Christ-centered life because you’re busy with all these things. I think the key is recognizing the way in which God intends you to do that. Maybe He doesn’t mean for you to spend hours every day in prayer before the Blessed Sacrament, but He may very well mean for you to turn your heart toward Him many times a day that would add up to a lot more.
“I always think about how when my toddler was 2- or 3-years-old, how they want to share everything with me. Whether they get hurt or if they have some accomplishment when they’re playing with a toy or building something, their first instinct is to turn toward me, to share that moment with me. It’s like it’s not complete for them until they’ve shared it with me. I find that so precious and I try to keep it in mind because we’re all children of God and that’s what He wants from us too, for us to have that natural inclination of turning toward Him in all of our joys and sorrows and to never consider any part of our day complete until we share it with Him, until we experience it with Him.”
To learn more about “Small Steps,” visit Danielle’s website by clicking HERE, or visit the Small Steps blog HERE. Check the May 9 issue of Our Sunday Visitor for my feature story on Catholic motherhood, which includes a longer interview with Danielle, by clicking HERE (open to subscribers only).
by Mary | May 3, 2010 | Uncategorized
This week, in anticipation of Mother’s Day, I will be featuring interviews with and books by Catholic moms over at OSV Daily Take. (I’ll repost here at the end of the day.) Today I’m talking with Donna-Marie Cooper O’Boyle, author, speaker and host of EWTN’s “Everyday Blessings for Catholic Moms.” Her first book was the “Catholic Prayer Book for Mothers” (Our Sunday Visitor, 2005), which immediately hit the Catholic bestseller list. She followed that up with “The Heart of Motherhood: Finding Holiness in the Catholic Home” (Crossroad Publishing, 2006). Here’s what Donna had to say in an email interview about Catholic moms and the struggles they face:
“I wrote ‘The Heart of Motherhood’ because I felt passionately about wanting to help encourage Catholic and Christian mothers who seldom get a pat on the back for a job well done in the home — their domestic church. I know it’s not easy for a mother to hold her head up high in our world today where motherhood was once a revered vocation. Our culture dictates to us that our worth is measured by the size of our paycheck,” Donna said.
Donna, who is also the author of “Mother Teresa and Me: Ten Years of Friendship” (Circle Press, 2009), says Catholic moms need affirmation as they face unique challenges, working hard to care for their families while trying to make regular time for God.
“As much as they may try to set aside certain prayer times, they invariably get interrupted by a myriad of demands that most times require their immediate attention because they are dealing with children,” she explained. “I try to get across in my books and talks that a faithful mother who is striving to care for her children devotedly pleases God immensely. After all, it is God who has placed her in the heart of the home to raise her children.”
Donna’s newest book, “A Catholic Woman’s Book of Prayers,” will be published by Our Sunday Visitor in September. Click HERE for more information and to visit Donna’s website.
Check back here tomorrow for another perspective on Catholic motherhood.
